Pyrex 6
Characters
Pyrex (13 year old boy)
Narakun (Teacher in her late twenties)
Scene 1
Pyrex and Narakun are on stage. Pyrex is sitting down at a table and Narakun is in front of a whiteboard.
NARAKUN
Hello students, welcome to you first class of the year… I am-
PYREX
Pyrex raises his hand quickly
Headmaster-San.
NARAKUN
Makes an attempt to not look at Pyrex
Narakun, as you should obviously and most blatantly be aware of-
PYREX
Headmaster-San!
NARAKUN
We are starting our study of Japanese culture; all of you who have decided to take this near pointless class will be-
PYREX
HEADMASTER-SAN!!!
NARAKUN
Pleased to know this year long course will feature an in-depth look at our modern culture.

PYREX
Oh! Headmaster-San! Headmaster-San!!! PICK ME!!!
Narakun stares at Pyrex

NARAKUN
Pyrex would you just… What is it?
Pyrex puts his hand down and stares
PYREX
Well, Headmaster-San, I was wondering-
NARAKUN
Save it Pyrex! I am introducing myself to the rest of your classmates. You already know me so just shut… just… be quiet!
PYREX
But-
NARAKUN
No excuses! I have had to deal with you all summer! I may be your Dorm-master but that does not mean you will be treated special in my class.
PYREX
But-
NARAKUN
Look, Pyrex, stop being a disruption. I have spent an entire summer with you and I don’t want to spend anymore.
PYREX
But-
Narakun waves her hands in the air

NARAKUN
WHAT!!! WHAT THE HECK DO YOU WANT!!!!!
PYREX
I’m your only student…
Narakun looks around the room for the first time.
NARAKUN
Wha… But… Why… How on earth did you become my only student!
PYREX
Well… no one wanted to learn about their own modern culture, they are all in Kaen’s Classroom learning about modern AMERICAN culture.
Narakun
But… Ugh, I am going to kill Kaen… Well, why on earth did you show up here?
PYREX
Because I’m American and I don’t want to learn about my own culture… plus Kaen isn’t nearly as amazing as you Headmaster-San.
NARAKUN
Pyrex, SHUTUP! And don’t call me Headmaster-San! I am not going to become your private tutor. After today I am going to transfer you out of my class and use this time for something good, like watching violent anime.
PYREX
But-
NARAKUN
No Pyrex, no buts, anything but BUTS! Do you know how sick and tired I am of you!
PYREX
But-
NARAKUN
NO! ONE SUMMER IS ENOUGH! I AM NOT GOING TO DEAL WITH YOU ANY LONGER YOU IDIOTIC CHILD!!!
Pyrex begins to sob

PYREX
Don’t send me away Headmaster-San, I’ll be good. I will bring you apples, and magazines, and always do my homework. I will follow you and make sure I have good grades. I will come to class on time, no, 15 minutes early! I’ll never do anything stupid and I’ll never EVER see anyone as being any better than you. Please don’t send me away.
Narakun FACEPALMS
Narakun
Pyrex, you really don’t understand how this world works. I find you to be very annoying, and giving me apples and magazines just makes it worse. I don’t care how much respect you have for me… but it is not going to help you one bit. In no less than 60 seconds I will be calling up Aima-San. I am going to make sure we can get you transferred to something nice like Ceramics, or Essay Writing, or even Comicwriting for all I care! All that will matter is the fact that I will only have to see you when you chase me down and when I inspect your dorm room. I will never see you in a class and I will never teach you anything ever again. The one thing I will teach you now is the fact that I hate you with every fiber of my shattered and twisted soul and I wish that you had never come to this island in the first place. As that wish can not be realized I will do the next best thing, which is to act upon the plan laid out earlier. Pyrex, to be blunt, I hate you, stop crying!
Pyrex stifles back tears
PYREX
Okay Headmaster-San-
NARAKUN
Don’t call me that!
Pyrex
Okay…
Pyrex gets up
Let’s go…
NARAKUN
Yes Pyrex, let’s go
They exit